No preamble, let's get right into it...
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OK, start with current finances...
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My finances are doing ok but now in the back half of this year most of my pension is going to taxes, so my savings are slowly bleeding out. I will need to sell some stock before year end, but it won't be too much. And I had planned for this. But I swear, even pinky swear, next year will be different.
So ... how is next year going to be different?
First: I'll start with the big item. Instead of doing a major Roth rollover like I've been doing every year since retiring next year I will cut it down. I am thinking I will do a $30k Roth rollover instead of the $70k I did this year, and $100k the prior year. That will allow me to pay $10,000 - $15,000 less in taxes.
Second: In May '27 my car loan payments will be coming to an end. Yes, I could pay off the loan, but at 2% I will just let it end normally. I'm paying around $15,000/year on the loan so lets call it $8,000 less I need to spend in '27. Huzzah.
Third: I'll start medicare and I will be able to use my HSA for the monthly payments so there's $500/mo. more for me as well. (Starts near year end, so not much in '27, but it's still nice to have!)
Fourth: I will be able to get at least part of the senior bonus tax savings (I do turn 65 next year!) Maybe $2,500 less taxes due to this!
So my extra cash flow for next year is approximately: $12,500 + $8,000 + $2,500 + $1,000 for a total of $24,000
Oh yeah... my pension has a COLA which should add about $2,000 as well. And what do I have plans for with this money? Probably some house repairs/ upgrades. New flooring is top of the list. New driveway is a possibility. The garage needs some repairs too. Uh oh, I may use a good chunk of that free cash flow.
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And then there's everything else
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Well fall is taking its sweet time getting here. Still using my a/c, but supposedly temps finally drop starting tomorrow. 'bout time.
Two weeks ago I visited with my mother. As usual I was master repair guy, this time fixing a hole in her roof. Yes, it's the roof I worked on over a decade ago. I made a mistake in how I shingled around sky lights - oops. Looked great and worked great for a decade but now its causing (caused) damage around both skylights. I went on the roof and initially made a mistake, but a good mistake. I started working on the sky light I thought had damage, but it was the wrong one. But in doing so I found that there was inital damage on this one also, so both needed repair. I even had to cut out a piece of roof and replace it. But I got'er done. The next day the north-easter started pouring rain in the area so we had tons of rain. I went in the attic and checked it two days later - not a drop. A few days chilling, and back home I came.
Also while there we visited my cousin with the RV. In the past year it was used once, but by his sister. That's all? And now he has gotten an electric bike 🚲 -they're not cheap! I found it in his basement with no easy way to get out, and he says, of course, he hasn't used it once yet. Dude, its the end of summer, if you haven't used it all summer - when??? I mean... he has spent some money to redo flooring in a few rooms of the home he shares with his mother, and he doesn't complain about not having enough money. So who am I to say he's wrong? But still... Oy vey.
Back on the Labor Day weekend I spent it at, for the lack of a better phrase, a personal relationships conference. I used to do this with the Ex-GF, but you don't have to be in a relationship to attend. I went by myself, and sorta like Tabs wrote in his blog post, I felt like an imposter while I was there. Not to get into details, but so often I feel like I don't belong at social gatherings -especially this one, so it can be really hard for me. Add my mild social anxiety issues, and the weekend was a roller coaster to be sure. Also my Ex was there and was really nice to me whenever we were together. That said I got to see why she is my ex. There was a situation where she was great, better than I could ever be, but then another time I was like OMG she was a disaster. Thankfully there was much more good than bad, but sheesh. Oh well, we are still friends and I can take her in moderate doses, and that's a good thing at least.
Since then I have spent more time on forums where people discuss relationships. OMG, what I read makes me think I will be single the rest of my life. Women that literally say (Yes, this is a quote) "I think it's in a woman's best interest to create a disagreement to see what he's made of. Time is valuable, no sense in wasting it." This is a woman my age. Response to her by a mid 40s y.o. states every man has childhood trauma, insists he should be in therapy, then shows a list of questions she asks that are some of the most ... maybe obnoxious is the word here. Oh, her bio states she wants a man that adores her but states she will be happy but single until she finds a "genuinely exceptional man. If he even exists." I am shocked, shocked I say, that she is single. Well... not that shocked. Oh my god, I just... I haven't the words. All the "pronouns" everywhere. And then the people posting about "micro-agressions" (their words), and I am just over it.
Do I need to start going to church? Start my own religion? I'm really at the point I think I am going to remain single, and that it may be for the best. Maybe move cross country and help my son? Lord knows he could use some help. Or move to some country where people have some sanity still? [Editor's note: This was written two weeks ago - Single Guy has recovered and is more chill now and thinking being single is a good thing. Back to his writing...] There is a woman I connected with recently, though she lives a state away. If nothing comes of it, well life goes on and that's good too. We talked a few times, so that's a start at least. Having someone to connect with, even if it's minor is a big help in feeling connected to the world.
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So that's it. Lots of good/great stuff, and lots of bad/awful stuff. As Dickens said, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Can I just have the better times?
October 3rd, 2026 at 04:47 pm 1791046059
Yeah it's still very hot where I am, even though it has gone down a bit. I too am still using AC.
Haha yeah, the way my track record is, I think I'm going to be single for the rest of my life too. Some are living in relationship hell that I never want to be in again. Of course, I wouldn't mind finding someone, but without the right kind of life partner, I think being single is not at all the worst way to go.
October 4th, 2026 at 06:58 pm 1791140337
Good for you for forcing yourself out of your comfort zone at the relationships conference. I think that we have to keep stretching those boundaries so that they don't shrink too much.
I'm definitely in the single for life group, though I didn't get there until probably my mid-50s. It was the point at which I started thinking, "if I have a relationship with this person and they end up developing dementia, am I going to have as many caretaker years as good years?" I've seen too many friends and relatives and clients now end up as caretakers for a declining partner, and while that's always stressful, it seems more "worth it" to me if you've had 30 or 40 good years together, as opposed to say (like one of my best friends, 7 good years before diagnosis and then 8 years of progressive decline until he died this past summer.
You don't need a permanent relationship to have people to connect with.
October 4th, 2026 at 07:00 pm 1791140412
I'm sorry you have not met someone who makes your life extra special. There are a lot of duds out there, both male and female. DH has a friend who is, as we say, always on the prowl. He's harmless, but heavens does he have major criteria for a relationship. Yet he wonders why he doesn't have a steady girlfriend. His first prerequisite is they have to be very healthy, no major health problems. I get that the lost his second wife to Alzheimer's and I could understand his fear, but the sad thing is he isn't healthy and is fighting cancer. So, she has to be healthy, but he isn't. Plus all his conversations revolve around him and what he likes to do. I can't see that with either you or Tabs.
October 6th, 2026 at 06:07 am 1791266824
October 10th, 2026 at 01:18 am 1791595093
To DK62565: I am going to the gym 5 days a week for 2 hours, so no guarantees, but so far so good. As for a match for me, I expect someone that is - at least - serious about their health. I'm not expecting perfection, it can be far from it, but at least making an honest effort to improve. That was one of my big bugaboos with the Ex-GF. When we started I told her I expected at least someone that is trying to stay healthy. She did - at first - but in the last year or two of her working career that stopped and well, it got extreme. In the end she couldn't do anything with me and expected me to be ok with that. Now that we are apart I still hear from her and she is dealing with her health issues (at least somewhat) and some other issues as well that she refused to take seriously while with me. One of the unfortunate things I have learned over the years, people (a least those I've been with) won't deal with problems until absolutely forced to do it. And that generally means only when they're no longer in a relationship with me. When in the relationship, they expect me to deal with their issues. Sometimes life just sucks that way.
October 16th, 2026 at 05:03 pm 1792170199
I, too, am in the single for life category. Not by choice, but that's just the way it ended up. I try to fill my life with meaningful friendships and open myself up to forming lasting bonds wherever they might appear. Volunteer work helps. Having relied mostly on online dating to meet new men in past years, I just feel it was hard to meet quality men. At this point in life, I think it might be unrealistic to expect to meet the perfect match or the love of your life. I would be happy to meet someone who was available for regular get-togethers, a close relationship that didn't necessarily call for marriage or even living together. Everyone gets set in their ways.